The turkey is stuffed and in the oven. The table is set, and the football game is on. When the kids were little, I always placed three kernels of Indian corn on each plate. Before we ate, we went around the table and shared three things we were thankful for the past year. While they rolled their eyes when they sat down and saw the three little corn kernels sitting between them and the feast, I think they also appreciated it. One of the first Thanksgivings that son #1 was away from home and cooking himself, he sent me a picture of one of their plates with three corn kernels on it. It is the little things that make a mother heart stop.
Three kernels of corn to represent three things I am thankful for this year.
Family was always at the top of everyone’s list. So, in keeping with the corn kernel tradition, I am sharing three things I am thankful for this year.
Family. Duh – it is on the top of the list every year.
Health. As we get older, we come to appreciate this even more.
You. I appreciate your sticking with me through my musings on retirement life that I share in this blog.
So happy Thanksgiving to you dear reader. And a belated happy Thanksgiving to those of you in Canada who celebrated last month. I am grateful that you are willing to take some of your precious time to read my humble little blog and share comments. Have a wonderful day enjoying friends, family and lots of nap inducing food!
Here in the Northwest, we don’t just eat turkeys, we frequently have to wait for them to cross the road. Sometimes I feel like we have more turkeys than people. Or perhaps there are just getting to be more people that act like turkeys. I get confused.
How much of your life have you lived on Someday Isle? Someday Isle is that ambiguous position between how I am living right now and how I want to be living. It is that time of waiting for “something” to happen in order to be happy. We spend so much of our lives waiting for something to change or happen in order to fully appreciate life. Waiting to start school, waiting to be done with school, waiting to leave home for the first time, waiting for the wedding day, waiting to hear back on the job interview, waiting to buy that first home, waiting for the baby to arrive, waiting for the empty nest, waiting to retire. Now what are you waiting for? Maybe it is time to quit living on Someday Isle.
Another boat to Someday Isle is procrastination. It comes in all sorts of forms. Someday I will lose those pesky ten pounds. Someday I will start the exercise class. Someday I will eat healthier. Someday I will put self-care first, or a million other promises we make to ourselves… someday. Today is the someday that we have been waiting for.
When Mr. U’s aunt passed away, we had to clean out the house she lived in since childhood. The upstairs had not been lived in for years and had become a storage area. In it we found unopened tins of Christmas cookies and unopened boxes of chocolates that were now stale. There were beautiful hand embroidered pillowcases. They were all being saved for someday. There were also stacks of styrofoam containers and even bags of cut hair. His aunt lived through the depression, and she kept these items for that elusive someday. Not really sure how the hair was going to be used though???
Many times, when you reach a certain age, there are less “somedays” to look forward to, so we start looking back. We remember, with rose colored glasses, the good ole days. The one perfect touchdown made, the soul stirring first kiss, the award we won, the big deal we landed at work, the abundant feeling of a full nest. As you get older, it is easy to fall into the trap of feeling like the best of life is behind you. Instead of living in the abyss of waiting for someday or remembering the good ole days on replay, why not enjoy the abundance of living in the here and now. As the song by Gabby Barrett says, “cause right here, right now, I say these are the glory days.”
Using some SKI fund money on the cheap. Yeah, we are “fancy like” two buck chuck wine in plastic cups with a gorgeous view.
SKI fund
A couple that was traveling in our area recently told us that they were here using some of their SKI fund for the trip. It was the middle of summer so of course we had to ask what a SKI fund was. It was their acronym for “spending the kid’s inheritance.” Smile.
We have never been freer to do as we please than we are in retirement. Our children are grown and building their own lives, and we get to reap the rewards from that. If we planned our retirement finances well, we are free from a work schedule and financial concerns. Yet, even in the glory days of retirement, it is still too easy to live on Someday Isle, especially if you have been living there most of your life. It can become our normal. It used to be called delayed gratification, which I believe in. However, we have delayed and saved and now is the time to enjoy the benefits of that.
We keep waiting to take the next big trip to Europe because my dad is 97 years old, and I worry about being that far away from him. We are reluctant to buy that condo in the sun because we wonder if we will use it enough to be worth it. And then there is the fact that we really need to downsize… someday. This is what liv’n on Someday Isle looks like in retirement and it is time to get off and start using our SKI fund.
Getting off of Someday Isle
Of course we want to be prudent with our money in retirement. We don’t want to run out of money before we run out of life. And of course we want to leave something to our children when we leave this earth. But we also need to enjoy the here and now. After all, have you ever seen a U-Haul trailer behind a hearse?
We spend our whole life being responsible, doing the right thing, being the good girl, and we forget to live out some of our dreams. The majority of people that are close to death have more regrets about what they didn’t do than what they did do. I don’t want to get to my deathbed and have regrets that I did not live out the things on my someday list, and retirement is the perfect time to do that. All it takes is one good health scare to remind you that THIS is the someday that we have been saving for. It is a beautiful life waiting to be lived. So, let’s take the plunge and swim off of Someday Isle.
Take the first available boat and get off of Someday Isle to live life to the fullest now.
I can’t deny it any longer. The cold weather is arriving. It did not even check with me to see if I was ready. I am not. At least mentally. However, we are prepared otherwise. The boat and camper are winterized and tucked into the shop. The firewood has been split and stacked. The sprinkler system has been blown out. The pizza oven is covered, and the outdoor chairs have been placed under shelter. Lastly, the tractor has the blade on it to plow our long, rather steep, driveway. Now we wait for the temperatures to drop and the snow to fly. It is time to cozy up.
Around this time every year I have to make an attitude adjustment. I mourn the sunshine and warmth. I miss having morning coffee outside listening to the bird’s cantata. I miss the sun casting a blanket of warmth on my shoulders. And I miss the ease of just throwing on shorts and a pair of flip flops, instead of having to bundle up with layers of cloths. But we live in the PNW and that means the days get shorter and the temperatures get colder. And colder. And colder. So, instead of fighting it, I am trying to embrace it. Because nothing is quite as beautiful as frost on the trees and a spanking new layer of snow on the ground. Attitude is everything.
Frost settles over the Tamarack trees, as fall gives way to winter. (Photo credit to my wonderful sister.)
Here in the Pacific Northwest, we get four very distinct change of seasons. I absolutely love that. The outdoors becomes this evolving canvas that you never get tired of observing. Years ago, we lived in Portland, Oregon (back when Portland was cool). It was the first time I had lived in a big city, and I was thrilled to experience something new and different. I especially loved the lush greenery that surrounded every nook and cranny of earth. But, as we soon learned, there is a price you pay for all of that vegetation… rain. Four seasons of rain: heavy rain, moderate rain, light rain and the “I am sick of rain” rain. After four years we were ready to move back closer to family and living with four distinct seasons again. Even if it meant that one of those seasons could be bitter cold and gray.
As with most things in life, it is the diversity that gives our lives texture and interest. So, in an effort to savor the art of living seasonally, I came up with a list of ten things I love about winter:
Settling into a good book on a snowy day. Spending hours reading is an indulgence that only a day snowed in at home can give me the permission to do.
Evenings by the fire listening to it crackle and pop, while I sip a glass of hot spiced wine.
The very first snow fall. Best if I am tucked away at home watching it float down and silence the earth.
Playing some Frank Sinatra music and lighting scented soy candles to create a peaceful mood.
Taking a walk in the crisp air with the sun bouncing off of the snow. The feel of the cold air on your face is invigorating and makes you feel alive.
Coming home to make a hot cup of tea in a favorite mug that my mom gave me several years ago.
Loosing track of time as I settle into my office/craft room to let my creative juices flow.
Pulling on a comfy pair of hand knit socks first thing on a chilly morning. Bonus that my friend made them for me.
Making a big pot of soup and leaving it to simmer on the stove all day. Even better if I took the time to make homemade bread or rolls to go with it. Winter is no time to be counting carbs.
One of the best gifts of winter is the holiday season. Thanksgiving and Christmas are full of precious time with family, delicious food and grateful hearts. What more could we want? Well, maybe a little sunshine to go with it.
Sorry, this picture is a little crooked. Must have been from the glass of hot spiced wine I was enjoying in front of it.
So, as the temperatures slowly drop below freezing, I am making an effort to settle into the winter months ahead. I am reminding myself of all the lovely things I enjoy about this time of year. This is the season of hygge, and I am going to melt into it. Because, as much as I complain discuss the colder weather, I honestly enjoy the unique beauty and coziness that this time of year brings with it. (At least at the beginning of the season… I will have a tough time coming up with reasons I love winter once February rolls around.) So, make a cup of hot tea or warm spiced wine, grab a good book, put your feet up by the fire and cozy up for the months ahead.
Lover of flip flops, waking up without an alarm, fireside chats, street tacos, waves lapping up on shore, creativity, family, the cork and all things garlic.
