Tag: #retirement

Little Lake Life

Posted on by The Retired Alchemist

Moving isn’t just about a physical change of location. It often includes a change of lifestyle or embracing a new phase in life. This summer we didn’t just move from our home of 24 years; we also moved to a different lifestyle. We moved from our wonderful deep-rooted memories enmeshed in the large home where we raised our kids while balancing our busy careers to our current lifestyle as retired, empty nesters. It wasn’t just about the physical location; it was about shedding our old selves in order to embrace our new selves.

Our new home is smaller and much closer to town. It has an open floor plan to accommodate larger family gatherings. Instead of sitting up on a hill, it is tucked in the bay of a small lake. Instead of being up a long gravel driveway, it is on a paved (albeit busy) country road, just two minutes from town. It is also coming full circle for me. You see, I grew up on the very property where we built our new home. This was no ordinary move.

Settle in for a story

Over 65 years ago my grandpa acquired several acres of property through a bartering deal with a couple of widows, when times were tough and people worked with what they had available. My grandpa was a skilled carpenter, and these two widows needed a new roof put on their house. They did not have the money to pay him, but they did have some property that they would trade him for his skills. It was a lovely piece of ground on a small lake. My grandpa built a house on the hill and gave my parents the piece down by the water.

It was here, on a section of this property that my dad and grandpa built the beautiful, two-bedroom, one bath home that my five siblings and I grew up in. Back then money was tight, so they did the work themselves and bartered for jobs they could not do. They hauled logs from the hillside, which served as both the framing and exterior walls. They brought in a small mill to cut the knotty pine walls, trim and cupboards for the interior. They used layers of cardboard for insulation. My dad hauled rock to make the cement walks. It was a labor of love, done on a shoestring.

One of the first winters in their new home. You can see my brothers looking out the window.

It was such a wonderful place to be a kid, with the lake in front of the house and the Portal to the magical forest behind it. We grew up playing king of the mountain on a large inner tube while balancing on the waves in the summer and skating on the lake under the moon in the winter. We invented our own games and made houses out of limbs and rocks. My siblings and I are still close. Perhaps because we shared such a small space growing up. We did not care because it was packed with love, security and warmth. Life was good.

Even my kids have great memories visiting my parents over the holidays and spending many a Christmas Eve in that little lake house, crowded in between their cousins eating from the huge buffet of food and opening gifts. This cozy knotty pine home was part of their history too.

The house as I remember it growing up (left). We ate many meals out on that picnic table. The house in its heyday (right). The sunroom was added on years later.

Fast forward

Several years ago, my mom had some health issues, so she and my dad decided to move to a 55+ neighborhood in town. My 98-year-old dad still lives in their house in town. The little house on the lake sat vacant for a few years and then served as temporary housing for a couple of their grandkids. However, it was slowly deteriorating. It was weighing on my dad, so after my mom passed, he gifted the house and surrounding property to his children. Everyone was reluctant to take on the house. It was an archive of good memories, but very difficult to live in. And it needed a ton of work.

This all occurred during a time when Mr. U and I were considering downsizing and moving closer to town. I had a few “musts” for any future home we moved to. One being that it needed to have two bathrooms. (I know, first world problems. Or, more likely, it is from sharing one bathroom with seven other people all of those years growing up.) I also wanted a creative workspace/office. Lastly, we wanted enough room to entertain our large family, but not so big it was hard to maintain. We were supposed to be downsizing, after all. Then… the little lake house became an option.

The little lake house sat vacant for a few years.

Could we take on the house and the major project needed to renovate it? The property is beautiful, and my dad really wanted it to stay in the family. The timing was right for us, so we decided to tackle it. Our initial intent was to do a major remodel and add on. But as we started to explore the structure of the house, we realized that the log walls would not be able to continue to support it for long. The very logs that were holding the house up (and served as the framing and exterior walls) were rotting away, as was the wood under the eaves. And don’t even get me started on all of the codes and restrictions for a house that is tucked between the water and a county road.

We were stuck in a pickle. It would have been almost impossible to save the current structure, and yet, I wasn’t sure I had it in me to totally rebuild the house that held so many good memories. However, we could not live in it the way it was either. It was a heartbreaking decision. The worst part was that, to an outsider at a distance, it looked fine. Why would we take down a perfectly good house?

Sadly, the logs that held the house up were rotting away.

After many tears and discussions with family members, we decided it was time to let the house go and rebuild. As one of my brothers reminded me, it wasn’t the structure as much as the surrounding area and lake that held so many wonderful memories for us. And while my dad would have liked for the house to stay exactly the same, as he remembered it all of those years, he said it had served its purpose and gave us the green light to rebuild.

Building a shell for new memories

Once the difficult decision was made, it was easier to move forward with the build. However, either I had forgotten about the stress of building, or it is just that I am getting older, but it was not an easy project. It did not help that I wanted to retain some of the structure of the old house into the new one, such as building an accent wall with some of the beautiful old knotty pine paneling that my dad and grandpa milled and using an odd sized exterior door that my grandpa had salvaged and used in the log house. Thank goodness we had a very patient contractor.

Rebuilding the little lake house.
The contractor made an accent wall using the pine paneling from the previous house. Mr. U built a bench from the wood and used the previous pine fireplace mantel as a shelf. We still need to add coat hooks (left). Mr. U and I laboriously sanded down the old door from the previous home and had it stained before adding it to the new build.

Modern version of the old lake house

We still have a ton of outdoor work to do, but we plan to return the place back to its former glory during its heyday years.

This fall we sold The House that Built a Family and moved into our “little lake house.” Now this shell is patiently waiting to be transformed from a house into a home. It is waiting for family gatherings, BBQ’s, grandchildren playing, and lots of cozy evenings tucked in by the fire. It takes a lot of living and building memories to transform a house into a home. So now we are in the process of building new memories on a solid foundation of love and a life lived well at this spot by the lake.

Little lake life then and now.

Final thoughts

What a gift to be back living on this little lake. Of course, in my naivety of the 1960’s I did not fully appreciate what we had… I do now. It was here that I first learned the importance of being surrounded by family and how being wrapped in love soothes the inevitable wounds of life. I learned how spending time in nature heals our souls. This very place shaped who I am. I will be forever grateful to my mom and dad for being able to grow up at this little lake and now returning to live out our retirement years here.

Cheers to the retirement years!

Gone Fish’n

Posted on by The Retired Alchemist

What do you do when you have a ton of boxes to unpack and a new home to decorate? Go fishing. We have been working really hard for the last several weeks and we were both ready for a break. I am not crazy about fishing, but Mr. U enjoys it, and I love being on the water. So, we decided to ignore the garage that is stuffed with every item we did not think we could part with (even after multiple downsizing efforts) and fired up the boat. We threw in the poles, a cooler and some very disgusting maggots that I refused to allow in the cooler, and off we went.

Kokanee are a small type of freshwater sockeye salmon that exist in many lakes in the PNW and down into California. There are particular times of the year that the kokanee fish are biting, and fishermen are abuzz when it occurs. They discuss bait, the best spots to find them and the depth of water the fish are at. Then they adjust their downriggers to that depth. Don’t ask me how I know… I would rather be lying in the boat reading. However, I support the fishing effort because these small pink flesh fish are delicious to eat.

The calm before the fish started really biting.

The afternoon was pretty quiet with only a few bites, which was perfect for me to read and sip a cold drink. But once the sun moved down low in the sky, the fish really started biting. I am the official netter, so unfortunately that kept me busy. Well, that and trying to take pictures, which Mr. U did not really appreciate while he was trying to pull fish into the boat. (When my family complains about me taking too many photos, I always remind them that they will cherish them later.)

It is not easy netting a fish and taking a picture at the same time. At least I did not drop my phone in the water.

Kokanee are excellent to eat and bonus that they are high in omega-3. They have a delicate pink meat and no fishy taste. The size of the fish varies from year to year. Part of the reason we made a point to go out this year was that they were pulling in large fish, running from 10-14 inches. Other years they have been much smaller, in which case Mr. U has smoked them. The smoked fish are a wonderful addition to a charcuterie tray or in a smoked salmon dip with crackers. The fish we caught this year were good size, so we grilled them. Delicious, healthy and low calorie. A trifecta food!

Grilled up a couple fish for dinner and the rest went in the freezer.

So glad we jumped on the impulse to go fishing on a Sunday afternoon. Yes, there were numerous other things we should have been doing but heck, we are retired, so we can always unpack boxes tomorrow. What is a weekend???

Cheers to the retirement years!

The gentle rocking from the waves made it difficult to get a clear picture, but it was a beautiful evening.

Signs of Summer

Posted on by The Retired Alchemist

And all at once the rain stopped, the mud puddles dried up, and the blossoms opened. People crawled out of their stuffy homes with squinting eyes and exclaimed, “it is finally summer!”

We’ve had a busy few weeks with family in town, birthday celebrations and preparing to put our home on the market. We almost missed that summer arrived in the process. Yahoo! Let the blooming and sunshine begin.

I hope that you can take some time to enjoy the pleasures of summer: the first of the garden gifts, baby birds chirping to be fed, firing up the BBQ and having a meal al fresco, or a relaxing sunset at the end of a full day. It is the little things.

“Some of the best memories are made in flip-flops.”

Kellie Elmore

Cheers to the retirement years and the arrival of summer!

Vintage People

Posted on by The Retired Alchemist

The Oxford Dictionary describes vintage as “denoting something of high quality, especially something from the past…” It is often associated with a good quality wine that just gets better with age. Vintage items are often valued for their unique style and individuality. The good news is that, like a vintage item, people often get better with age too. Both vintage items and vintage people get a faded patina over time that draws you to them. 

What happens with time that causes this change? The bumps and bruises of life slowly smooth down our sharp, rough edges.  We no longer feel the need to judge others, or ourselves. Because, well… why? We often allow ourselves to become the person we were always meant to be.  The person that could not fully emerge in our younger years because we were too busy, too driven, too worried about other people’s opinions.  We were trying so hard to be successful, to be the perfect mom, brother, friend, employee, or daughter, that we lost ourselves in the process. 

In our younger years, we weren’t ripe yet. Like The Velveteen Rabbit, it takes time to become real. It takes years of living to wear down our rough edges and create us into the person who holds life with a gentle hand, acutely aware of how fragile it is. We recognize that our time here on earth is fleeting, and we need to squeeze every bit of joy out of it. Take the trip, savor the meal, listen intently to others, pay the sincere compliment, stop and watch the sunset, take the risk, live well. Now is the perfect time to fully bloom into ourselves because, like a good wine, vintage people just get better at living as they age.

“Aging is not for the weak.  One day you wake up and realize that your youth is gone, but along with it, so go insecurity, haste, and the need to please… You learn to walk more slowly, but with greater certainty.  You say goodbye without fear, and you cherish those who stay.  Aging means letting go, it means accepting, it means discovering that beauty was never in our skin… but in the story we carry inside us.”

              Meryl Streep

Things that get better with age

Aside from vintage people, many other things just get better with age. Some that come to mind are:

  • An old tome that you have outlined and marked up over the years.  One that you go back to over and over again for strength and inspiration.  “Gift from the Sea” by Anne Morrow Lindbergh is one of these for me.
  • A huge weeping willow tree that branches out providing shade and mystery. Bonus if children have built a fort in it.
  • A well used, cookbook.  One where you can find the best recipes easily because the worn pages are stained and dog eared. 
  • A well-seasoned cast iron skillet that has cooked up hearty family meals over the years.
  • A pair of favorite slippers that are worn in all of the right places. Slipping into them slows your racing heart.
  • A vintage car that has been well maintained and cared for. The value just goes up with time.
  • A long standing friendship that has a history of shared stories and memories.  One where you can totally be yourself and know you will be loved and accepted. 
  • A quality bottle of wine or whiskey that has been sitting on the shelf waiting for the perfect celebration.  Smooth and easy.
  • The red rock formations in Utah and Arizona.  The ones that have been shaped by thousands of years of wind and water. 

Being vintage comes with some scratches and wear

I was at a restaurant recently and an older man and his wife were eating in a booth near us.  When they were ready to leave, his wife was trying to help him lift himself off of the soft, low booth seat, up to his walker.  After a few unsuccessful tries, Mr. U jumped up and helped them.  Experiencing our aging bodies is tough stuff. It is not for sissies.

The point of the above story is that, if we are blessed with the gift of many years on this earth, our bodies will eventually start to fail us.  The first signs of this are a few wrinkles and the occasional gray hair that we quickly pluck away.  But then another one comes up and we realize that if we keep plucking, we won’t have any hair at all. We forget where we set our glasses, or we can’t get that jar open with a quick twist anymore. Our bodies don’t react as quickly, and we are not as balanced as we once were.  We can wake up with aches and pains that we have no fathomable reason for.  How does one hurt their shoulder while sleeping?

This is normal aging, and it is not something any of us look forward to.  We can eat healthy, exercise regularly and yet, eventually our bodies will rust out. But one thing we can control through the aging process is our attitude. Age can turn some people into themselves where their pain and sadness live. These older people have allowed the bumps and bruises of life to make them angry and unhappy with themselves and life in general. We have all met them. I don’t want to be that person. There is enough sadness and negativity in the world without me adding to it. That is why I try to keep this blog positive. So, I am here to tell you that there is also some very good news that comes with aging.

“The gift of aging is walking more slowly knowing you are enough, letting go of what matters least and holding space in the midst of chaos.”

              IG:  Agingdisgracefully

The best things about being vintage

One of the things I particularly like about this phase of life is that I am much more willing to roll with the punches. I have time and space to stop and appreciate the glimmer of sunshine on the water, the wonder of the cloud formations, that first cup of coffee in the morning, or sit and watch the entire sunrise without feeling like I need to jump in the shower and get to work. I am more accepting of others. I realize that perfection is an illusion that I don’t want to chase anymore. I am much clearer on what makes me feel alive and have the time to invest in those things. There is a less of a need to control things, or worse yet, to try and control people. I realize that life is short, and I don’t want to waste it being critical, holding a grudge or wallowing in self-pity.

These are the best days of our lives.

I am in my 60’s and loving this phase of life. Retirement is fun! We have more time and financial resources than we ever did. We are able to enjoy our family and relationships with less borders around them. We loved raising our kids, but parenting takes a lot of your time and energy. Now we reap the benefits of that by enjoying time with our wonderful adult children. Bonus that we still get to experience the childhood phase through our grands, without the responsibility of raising them. (My greatest admiration goes out to grandparents that are raising their grandchildren.) If it wasn’t for the occasional health issues that keep popping up, it would be the perfect time of life. So, take time to slow down and appreciate these bonus vintage years.

Cheers to the retirement years and vintage people!

“Aging is an extraordinary process whereby you become the person you always should have been.”

David Bowie

Free Range Children

Posted on by The Retired Alchemist

Free range animals are said to produce much better, healthier meat, poultry and dairy products. These animals are not constantly kept in cages or overcrowded conditions. They are allowed to run outdoors to exercise and play in the sunlight to build their muscles and lung capacity in an open environment. If free range is healthier for animals, it stands to reason that it is better for humans too. I grew up a free range child.

Water, dirt and nature. Those are the secret ingredients that create a happy, healthy childhood. They are the stuff that free range children thrive in. Adults too. My siblings and I grew up in the country where a creek fed into a small lake in front of our house. There was a lovely, inviting woods across the road that we played in for hours. Of course, you had to traverse the scary cattle chute (Portal to the Imagination) to get to it. We were feral children, running with the sun on our shoulders, the wind in our hair and a smile on our faces. It was childhood at its best.

Free range play creates peace and calm in your soul.

What free range kids do with their time

We grew up in a home that my dad and grandpa built. It was a 1400 square foot, three-bedroom, one-bath log house and it sheltered six children from the bumps and bruises of life. By other people’s standards it was very small, but they did not know the joy behind those walls. While we did not have much interior space, my parents more than made up for it with love, security and their presence. And we had the space and freedom to roam the countryside free range style. We were blessed.

A few weeks ago, my wonderful sister gave me a small bag of pine nuts that she had gathered from the pinecones in her yard. She knew that it would ignite a delightful memory for me of when we were growing up. She and I would gather pine nuts out of cones that had dropped from the pine trees in our yard and then we would feast on them wholeheartedly. Little did we know that we were ahead of our time and that pine nuts would eventually be an expensive gourmet food. We also pulled the pitch off of sappy trees and chewed it like gum. That never became popular… understandably. It is a wonder we lived through our free-range eating experiences.

A wild Easter Lily just like what my sister and I picked as kids (left). A few pine nuts (right).

Growing up free range meant that my siblings and I could play outside for hours letting our imaginations lead us. We explored every inch of our property finding the best places to make forts or walking along the water’s edge pulling over rocks to catch crawdads. We had bullfrog races and made mud pies. Sometimes we would throw our fishing lines off of the dock and catch perch and sunfish that we would generously bring as offerings for my mom to fry up. She held firm though when we wanted her to cook the caviar eggs from the perch. We had to fry those ourselves. Another modern-day delicacy of sorts that I must admit I never liked.

My sister and I cannot see a wild Easter Lily without remembering the bouquets we would gather and bring to my mom on Mother’s Day and her birthday. What mother’s heart doesn’t melt when her child offers up a grubby little hand filled with flowers and says, “I picked these for you.”

Opening the gates for children now

It is more of a challenge to let kids run free range these days in our unpredictable world. Parents have to make a conscious effort to allow their kids opportunities to explore outside without an adult managing their time. It takes effort to pull them away from the T.V., Nintendo, and structured activities but it can be done. It was easier growing up in a tech-free world. The U.S. Forest Service has even declared a “National Get Outside Day” to encourage families to spend time together reconnecting with nature (Coast To Coast National GO Day Events Occurred In Support Of Let’s Move Outside | Home). While I applaud their efforts, there is also a part of me that is sad we needed to declare a day just to get kids out in nature. What ever happened to free range children?

Fortunately, they still exist. We just have to make the effort to get out there. Running around outside to explore is necessary for adults and children alike. Even in retirement, I need to spend time outdoors to free my soul. I see my grandkids frequently getting these very opportunities and it makes me smile. We had my 21-month-old granddaughter over the other day. When I asked her what she would like to do, the first thing she said was “outside.” I am grateful for another generation of free range kids. It will help build imaginative, healthy and holistic adults that will lead our world long after we are gone.

An addition to the free range flock

Speaking of the next generation, we have exciting news on the home front. Son #3 and his lovely wife had their second child last week! This precious little bundle is such a blessed addition to our free range flock.

The newest addition to our family.
Sons #3 and #4 are twins (fraternal – just because everyone always asks) sharing this precious moment together (left). Moi with my new grandson (right).